Month: September 2008

Obama Collects $20 bet from Michelle, uses the phrase “my muslim faith” in interview, “lipstick on a pig” at rally gets him $200

~ Wiberg ~ 4 Comments

UPDATE:

Michelle has offered to pay Obama $200 for the “lipstick on a pig” comment – see below for details of the couple’s ‘word game’ this campaign season! This most recent dare had Michelle Obama betting her husband, Barack, that he wouldn’t dare refer to Sarah Palin using “you can put lipstick on a pig, it’s still a pig”

Are you serious? He really said that?
Are you serious? He really said that?

On Sunday, Barack Obama won a bet from his wife Michelle Obama over whether he would use the phrase “my muslim faith” before the month of September ended.

The Obamas love a good laugh
The Obamas love a good laugh

“It was a challenge she presented to me, and I was up to it. Listen, I knew it would freak everyone out, but that’s just something we like to do!”

The presidential candidate pointed out that the couple has an ongoing game, daring each other to say outlandish things in the press during the campaign. The biggest prize was a $100 bet that Senator Obama lost when he challenged his wife to say “for the first time in my adult life, I’m proud of my country” earlier this year.

“She did it and I was all ‘I can’t believe you said that’ and she was all ‘believe it, brother.’ We love these games.

Other phrases that the couple dared each other to use include:

August 2008: “Who gives a shit about Canada?” (Michelle dared Barack to say this, which he didn’t, losing $15)

May 2008: “I drink too much” (Barack challenged his wife to use this at rally and she did. The media failed to report it and Barack had to shell out $50).

January 2008: “Is it hot in here or is it just me?” (again, Michelle challenged Barack to say this during the primary debates. Barack chickened out, and paid her $25).

All told, Michelle is up several hundred dollars in their little parlor game. The couple confesses they will continue the game through his presidential term, should he win.

“I’m going to win – it says so in the Koran.” Obama said, and laughed, acknowledging that last line will earn him $75 from Michelle.

Joe Biden and Lobbyist Son Hunter at the Dinner Table

~ Wiberg

Last month, Joe Biden’s Senate office spokesperson said the following about his son, Hunter Biden, who is a lawyer/lobbyists for several companies.

“Hunter Biden does not lobby and has not lobbied Senator Biden’s office,” Alexander said in an e-mail. “Our rules are dictated by the Senate ethics bill, and we follow it by the letter.” Alexander said she knew of no favors done for the son’s clients.”

But doubts were raised when a transcript was released several days later, as Hunter Biden visited his father’s home for Sunday dinner.

TRANSCRIPT:

Joe Biden: How is your work going, son?

Hunter Biden: Please don’t ask that, dad. I don’t want to cause any conflicts of interest.

JB: I understand. Can you pass me the salt?

HB: I can pass that salt, if you can pass the mustard.

JB: But there isn’t any mustard on the table.

(brief silence)

JB: Oh, yes, of course. I’ll pass that soon. It will get passed.

HB: Thank you dad. I love mustard. My friends back at the firm love mustard.

JB: I’ll pass it, don’t worry. Man, this mooseburger is delicious.

HB: Why are we having moose burgers? They taste awful.

JB: It’s a long story, but apparently the other side is going to pick some hockey mom from Alaska and the One – excuse me, Senator Obama – thought I’d should do some research on the folks up there – y’know, see what the eat, what they drink, that sorta thing. Hey, what do you think of my new hair?

HB: Not bad, dad. You look like a million bucks. Or at least a quarter of a million dollars.

JB: Is that all?

HB: Well, you might look like a little more, but it depends. I’d have to ask my colleagues. I’m still new at judging hair.

JB: You ask them. I’ll bet they see that I look like at least half a million bucks. I mean, this is great hair!

HB: I agree, but it isn’t doing that much lately.

JB: It will soon. This hair will do things for you, believe me. Tell your friends that. Now, can you pour me some more of that arctic icewater?

END TRANSCRIPT

A 2004 photograph shows close ties between Joe Biden and lobbyist Hunter Biden (who is on one side or the other of Joe - does it matter?)
A 2004 photograph shows close ties between Joe Biden and lobbyist Hunter Biden (who is on one side or the other of Joe - does it matter?)

Obama, Father of Two, Insists On Continuing Campaign for Presidency

~ Wiberg

Dismissing criticisms and demands by liberal bloggers to drop out of the presidential race to focus on his children, Barack Obama said he would continue, despite the fact that his kids recently scored “average” on their academic tests and continually ignore directions to keep their rooms clean.

Father of two children, Barack Obama says hes running for office to get away from his kids.
Father of two children, Barack Obama says he's running for office to get away from his kids.

“I know there are a lot of critics out there who say I should stay home, raise my kids, and not run for office. But, the kids are young. The littlest one – I can’t recall her name – just learn to read and, quite frankly, she isn’t that good at it. And when she’s reading to me or telling me a story, I get a little bored – she’s not exactly Garrison Keillor, if you know what I mean. I love my kids, but I just need my space.”

What about vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin, mother of five, including one with special needs?

“Listen,” he offered. “I have special needs – I especially need to get away from my own kids.”

Obama says “two” is the magic number. “I think if you have more than two kids, any decision to do anything other than raise their kids is entirely selfish. Look how the Kennedys turned out. Did you see that movie The Hills Have Eyes? That’s the Kennedys, unsupervised.”

The Kennedys - Not Stay At Home Parents
The Kennedys - Not Stay At Home Parents

Sarah Palin – One Heartbeat Away From Presidency? Probably Not. How Presidents Die In Office

~ Wiberg ~ 1 Comment

A semi-serious post:

All week long, the world wrings its hand and thinks “if John McCain wins, Sarah Palin will be one heart beat away from the Presidency!!! OMG!”

A review of Wikipedia’s page on Presidents Who Died In Office, indicates that Presidents generally don’t die by first losing their heart beat, ie ‘heart attack’, but by other, more preventable methods!

Four were assassinated (Lincoln, Garfield, McKinley, Kennedy), one died from pneumonia (Harrison), and another from gastroentitis (Taylor). Franklin Delano Roosevelt died from a cerebral hemorrhage.

Warren G. Harding was the only one, it seems, who died in office of a heart attack in 1923. Four presidents have been assassinated while in office, so that is a concern. But nobody goes around saying “If John McCain wins, Sarah Palin will be one bullet away or one uncooked steak away from the Presidency!! OMG!” because that would be tacky.

When he wasnt playing MurderBall at the White House basketball court, FDR was running the country
When he wasn't playing MurderBall at the White House basketball court, FDR was running the country. He died in 1945 from a cerebral hemorrhage, ending the longest presidency in U.S. history.

So, the chances any president is going to die while in office is slim to none. Joe Biden or Sarah Palin will just have to sit back, attend funerals and stay awake during the President’s State of the Union speeches.

And remember, this person is TWO heart attacks away from the presidency! OMG!:

Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi sends pizzas and cheesburgers everyday to the offices of the current President and Vice-President.
Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi sends pizzas, bacon cheesburgers, and donuts everyday to the offices of the current President and Vice-President.

Terminator 3 Robot Inspires Creation of Cindy McCain 3000 Robot

~ Wiberg ~ 1 Comment

As the new Cindy McCain 3000 robot finds its way into the hearts of America, details behind the robot design can now be revealed. Designers admitted today that the T-X, from the masterpiece film Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines, was the inspiration in creating the CM3K.

Rise of the McCains
Rise of the McCains - New Robot Wows America

Designers also admitted the the reported “broken wrist” was, in fact, a mechanical defect that had to be repaired in Reston, VA.

“The CM3K was designed in campaigning in mind, but we did not anticipate the amount of pressure placed on the robot limbs with all the handshaking,” reported one engineer.

The decision to go with the T-X design was an easy one. “We’re not going to build a politician’s wife to be ordinary. We wanted to go with a popular robot design and our research poll numbers indicated that the ‘hot’ model from the movie T3 was the way to go.”

Joe Biden – Private Sector Employment History Revealed! Young, Dumb, and Full Of

~ Wiberg

In a two minute investigative report using the internets, mostly Wikipedia, vice-presidential candidate Joe Biden’s private sector employment history was revealed, providing a stunning insight into the Delaware Senator, listed here:

1. Practiced Law in 1969.

1969 Employee of the Year
1969 Employee of the Year at Biden Law Offices

In 1970, Joe Biden was elected to a County Council position, and from there, went on to represent in the U.S. Senate, effectively ending his private sector employment history.

Even more impressive, Joe Biden currently lists his net worth between $59,000 and $366,000, making him one of the poorest current Senators. As one unnamed Senator put it: “Biden has done the impossible: he’s managed to be in the U.S. Senate for 30 years and not get rich. What a loser.”

Biden explained his financial situation to my imaginary friend. “I didn’t go to Washington to get rich. I went there to work. And, yes, had I known I could have made loads of money in D.C., I would have. For sure. I was young, dumb, and full of cumulative blue collar experiences that I thought I could use to help the public.”