Political

Charles Rangel needs an Inception something awful….

~ Wiberg

Charles Rangel (NY-D) needs to get it in his head to resign. I need an architect, chemist and forger. Who’s with me?

Somedy 'incept' this fool.

I am not exactly a fan of MSNBC, but I found it refreshing today to see video of Luke Russert actually ask a question of Rangel that ruffled the representative’s feathers. Instead of responding “no” to whether he’s worried about losing his position as representative over the ethics investigation-now-upcoming-trial, Rangel looked a little put off, confused, and seemed more interested in Russert’s inexperience (or youth).

So, what needs to happen is a covert team needs to take a nap, dream, find Rangel, make him dream within a dream and plant inside his stupid brain the idea of resignation!

I guess being a Democrat isn’t as fun when the “dumb questions” are directed to you.

Vote. November 4, 2008

~ Wiberg

So today is the day to vote and in California that means you can vote on thousands of propositions that will improve the lives of every single person and animal. We have too much free time in California that everyone citizen is a legistlator. Fun!

No purple finger here! just a sticker....

No purple finger here! just a sticker….

I voted absentee last week, which sucked because I didn’t get a sticker that says “I Voted” and so I had to make a sticker that says “I Voted Last Week Suckers!”

Several thoughts: I find it amusing that the talking heads on cable tv (like the New Yorker’s Hendrik Hertzberg) says that never in his lifetime did he think an African-American would be elected for President. I believe this was on Nov 3rd, in the early morning hours on MSNBC.  That comment isn’t racist? It tells me that he thinks little of his fellow Americans – both in the abilities of African-Americans, and others who would vote for someone who was African-American. It must be generational, because it never occured to me that an African-American wouldn’t be elected.  Or maybe I just watch too much of Fox’s 24.

Just as there are plenty of stupid and egomaniacal white people who run for politicial office, there are plenty stupid and egomaniacal African-American, Hispanic-American, etc citizens willing to run for office.  The bottom line is that the best and the brightest steer away from politics and so I’m not too impressed with those who run for local, state and federal positions. Will having Obama as the next president be wonderful? Maybe. Maybe not. Same as any other president. And certainly it is a big deal for older Americans of all types who grew up in a time where African-Americans were treated so horribly – it must seem like a dream made real, and you can’t help but appreciate that fact.   I would have preferred a different person fill that dream, but oh well.

Whoever wins, I wish them good luck.  But not too much luck, because they want too much of my money, and Obama and McCain, along with the Senate and House, are not creative enough to really solve anything.

Oh – and if McCain happens to win, don’t freak out. Don’t start a blog. Take it a like an adult.  Read a history book. The world will not end if your guy (either party) doesn’t win. I know this because I had a dream five years ago that informed the world will end in 2022 when the Dinosaurs return.

And, if anyone reads this, remember to vote, especially on the local and state stuff – sometimes this affects you more than the federal stuff, at least on a day-to-day basis (trans-fats, cell phones, gas taxes, bonds, etc…)

Bob Woodward Publishes Sarah Palin book – Exclusive Interview here! Kind of.

~ Wiberg ~ 1 Comment

Bob Woodward recently published his investigative book on Republican Vice-President nominee Sarah Palin. I had the opportunity to interview him Sunday afternoon via telephone:

Mark Wiberg: Hi Bob.

Bob Woodward: Hi, Mike.

Wiberg: It’s “Mark.” So, I understand you wrote this book this past weekend about the Governor of Alaska, John McCain’s surprise selection for vice president..

Woodward: Who?

Wiberg: Sarah Palin.

Woodward: Oh, yes. I didn’t realize she was the governor.

Wiberg: But you just wrote a book about her?

Woodward: I did, but much of what I wrote was sourced from unnamed sources, including people I never talked to, and none of them indicated to me that Palin was the governor of Alaska.

Wiberg: Okay. Let me ask you this – did you spend any time with Sarah Palin or her husband Todd?

Woodward: She’s married?

Wiberg: Yes.

Woodward: (scribbling) Interesting. Anyway, to answer your question: I did talk with Sarah during the writing of this book.

Wiberg: This past weekend?

Woodward: Yes, from my home here in DC.

Wiberg: And what was she like. How did she strike you as a politician and as a person.

Woodward: Well, she’s a woman. I got that much. Sounds a little Canadian, which could be a problem with some of ignorant people outside of DC. Actually, it was difficult to have a conversation with her because of the background noise. She seemed to be at a daycare center.

Wiberg: Maybe those were her kids?

Woodward: (scribbling) Kids?

Wiberg: Let’s back up. First, what’s your book about Sarah Palin called.

Woodward: It’s called Outside the Bush Inner Circle: Some Woman’s Journey to the Top, Written By the Great Bob Woodward.

Wiberg: Is that really the whole title? Even the “written by the Great Bob Woodward” part?

Woodward: Yes, why?

Wiberg: It seems like you just threw your name in there for no reason.

Woodward: Ego isn’t a reason?

Wiberg: Can you tell me anything you learned about Sarah Palin?

Woodward: I can. From conversations that I imagined, of course. What I learned was that during this historic 72 hour period, there have been a great many, heated arguments between Sarah Palin and others who I cannot name.

Wiberg: You can’t name them? Why not?

Woodward: Because they don’t exist. Duh!

Wiberg: Did you just say “duh.” You are a Pulitzer Prize winning writer, and you just said “duh.” That’s kinda lame.

Woodward: You’re kinda lame and I’m putting that in my next book, which is coming out next Wednesday?

Wiberg: You already have another book? You just finished this last one.

Woodward: I know, but this one is more timely.

Wiberg: And it’s about what?

Woodward: It’s about Tuesday.

Wiberg: Tuesday? like this coming Tuesday? You’re going to write about a day that hasn’t even happened?

Woodward: Yep.

Wiberg: Why?

Woodward: Because.

Wiberg: Because why?

Woodward: You’re not the boss of me, I don’t have to tell you.

At this point he hung up the phone, saying something about Patty Davis’ Myspace page.

——————-

(note: I hesistated posting this not because it’s totally fake but because it’s not that incredibly funny – but I liked the rushed book cover I made up and didn’t want it to go to waste – thanks for reading!).

Obama and Palin phone call: transcript revealed!

~ Wiberg ~ 3 Comments

On Friday, August 29, Senator Obama telephoned Governor Palin after John McCain selected her as his vice-president nominee, wishing her luck, but not too much. Here’s the transcript:

Obama: Hello, Sarah?

Palin: Yes, this is Sarah Barracuda.

Obama: It’s me, Obama.

Palin: What’s up?

Obama: Not much. Just working the campaign trail.

Palin. That’s so awesome! Hey, can you wait a sec? I have to put Trig down.

Obama: Sure.

(20 seconds of muzak)

Palin: Okay, I’m back.

Obama: Hey, good luck with your campaign.

Palin: Thanks!

Obama: But not too much luck! (chuckles)

Palin: Excuse me? “Not too much luck?” What the heck does that mean? What the heck are you saying, sir?

Obama: You know ‘not too much luck.’ It’s a joke. Listen, I was kidding.

Palin: Why would you call someone to wish them partial luck? Are you sick?

Obama: No, I’m not sick, it’s just, you know, it’s “good luck and all” but it’s not like I really want you to win this thing.

Palin: You don’t? But you called to wish me luck?

Obama: Partial luck.

Palin: What is wrong with you, sir?

Obama: Nothing. Listen, I’m sorry.

Palin: Really? Are you sorry or partially sorry.

(silence)

Palin: Hello, Senator?

Obama: Partially sorry, I guess.

Palin: I thought so. Y’know, Senator Obama, I appreciate the phone call but my other Blackberry is ringing. Good day.

Palin: Hello, this is Sarah Barracuda.

Joe Biden: Hey, Sarah. It’s Joe.

Palin: Who?

Biden: Joe Biden – senator from Delaware. The state with more people than Alaska? Near Maryland.

Palin: I’m not familiar with either of those counties, but go ahead.

Biden: I just wanted to call and wish you good luck.

Palin: Well, that’s very nice of you.

Biden: But not too much luck! (chuckles)

Disconnect.

(by mark wiberg)

Crazy prediction: Sarah Palin drops out

~ Wiberg ~ 3 Comments

While not funny and not photoshopped, I thought I’d share a possible scenario with this presidential campaign and election:

John McCain’s selection for Vice President, Sarah Palin, enjoys the spotlight for a few weeks, does the campaign thing, but eventually changes her mind and asks to be removed from the ticket, for whatever reason (kids, criticism, etc). Then, McCain selects someone with more experience, more age, and moves forward with campaign and wins the election. (Yeah, I know she just joined the campaign, but stranger things have happened!)

Why would this happen?

Her brief stint as a VP selection would serve to steal some of the media attention for a few days from Obama/Biden, following his historic speech, raise a lot of money from happy conservatives, and draw out the mean-spirited critiques of Sarah Palin, which might serve McCain’s to advantage as some may be turned off by Democratic attacks of the first Republican woman to be picked for the VP slot.

If this did happen, I don’t know if it would have been pre-planned, but it’s something to consider if one was cynical enough. I’m posting this so I can look prophetic. I am very impressed with this guy, who started a “Palin for VP” blog back in February 2007 – talk about being ahead of the pack. If Palin resigns, I want the media calling me.

UPDATED:

A portion of what I wrote in the Comments section re: this post:

When I wrote the post, I was only practicing cynicism, half-heartedly, following a phone call with a friend about why she was picked; I said it would be an unusually wild plan – to throw out bait in the form of Palin, as it were, to stir up both sides for different reasons to their advantage (ie, Obama? where’d he go? It’s all Palin, all the time now), and then pull her back and proceed with someone else. On purpose. Maybe Ashton Kutcher will hold a press conference with John McCain and yell “You’ve been punk’d!” Now, I don’t think this is true, but doing this ACCIDENTALLY isn’t out of the realm of possibilities!!

I’ll add this was posted before any of the idiotic smears showed up on the internet. I was just thinking of usual, expected political attacks that might allow for a big switch. Politics is mostly theater and this year it’s been amazing on both sides.

MORE UPDATE: Sunday evening, CNN’s Anderson Cooper blogs about a ‘what if’ Bobby Jindal had been selected – some of the comments relate to my own on this subject.

9/3/08 UPDATE:    Brief article on this possibility – the Prediction Market is taking bets on Palin withdrawing.

So, it is proven: I can write a few paragraphs without obvious and silly false statements and made-up photos afterall! (it’ll happen, the serious writing, but not often). — Mark