mark’s (mental) road tour

so i finish this one show last saturday night at the Grange in San Luis Obispo, and do well, everybody laughs (good!) and these people come up to me after the show and ask if I want to do a road tour around the country, and I’m like ‘yeah’ but then I say ‘which country’ just to make sure they’re not messing with me because one time I was asked to perform at a New Mexican nightclub and I thought they meant “a night clubin New Mexico” (the state) but it turned out they meant “a new night club in Mexico!’ and it took several People’s Courts appearances to sort it out. So, back to SLO and the people offering me a chance to tour the world. “These United States” they say and I almost hear the Battle Hymn of the Republic in the background, it’s that wonderful. So, after a couple of hours (cross the Is, dot the Ts sort of thing), it’s decided that I will go around this country, telling jokes in as many places. very cool. And I’ll be paid in very classy, commemorative collectible 9/11 bills. I was gonna argue for Pocahantas gold coins, but I didn’t want to push my luck. I’ve seen the commercials and those 9/11 bills are pretty sweet! Who wouldn’t be impressed if I rolled up to a parking valet, and say ‘keep an eye on my Honda, dude, and this very fine collectible bill will be yours.’ I’m not sure how they make change for those. All I know is that after this tour is done, I will be loaded with collectible bills that promise to increase in value someday.

So, anyway, this morning I go to work today, explain it my bosses and tell them that I can do my job from any computer and they are all ‘go for it, we’ll still pay you! Go do you want you want to do!! Just email us once in a while’ and so I leave tomorrow to cover the Northwest. I tell them about how I’m gonna be paid in collectible bills originating from Africa and they say that sounds like a swell plan because everyone knows the US dollar is down. I agree. I’m not economist, but I manage my credit card debt better than most. A lot of people I don’t know don’t have credit card debt because they don’t have credit cards so they know less than me.

So the plan is for me to take my stand-up comedy act to the Northwest states like Oregon, Washington. I leave later this week and will post all my (mental) adventures.

Stay tuned!